Several days later Vervain slipped out of the burrows and into the open. He stretched his paws and glanced up at the sky. Frith was nearly at his highest point. Excellent timing. That meant the flayrah would be delivered any moment now. Nodding at a fellow warren rabbit who was lazing outside, Vervain hopped into the maze. He could easily navigate it now. It hadn't taken him long to learn that at all (Buttercup had said she'd been impressed by how fast he'd memorized it). He took his time though for there was no rush. Noises drifted to him from the direction of the house which told him he'd be just in time. Though there was more than enough flayrah to go around, Vervain enjoyed having first pickings. At the edge of maze he halted and peered around to see if the humans were still there or not. He might take their flayrah but he didn't want them near or- Frith forbid- touching him. He'd heard from one rabbit that they sometimes even try to pick you up! Mostly the human kittens try this and if you struggle you can easily make them drop you but it seemed to Vervain to be in their best interests not to do something that might upset the humans. So he rather avoided them altogether.
The coast was clear. Vervain hopped over to the pile of flayrah. He rummaged around in it a little until he settled for a nice big carrot. He took it and headed to a more secluded spot behind the large tree, but not too close so he could still enjoy the warmth of Frith on his fur. He got comfortable in a soft patch of grass and idly nibbled at the carrot. His mind went over the titbits of information he'd already gathered on the other warren members. As he'd expected the maze was just as good a place to spy in as the tunnels in Efrafa had been. Though he had to get closer and find all the right spots first. Back in Efrafa, voices echoed through the tunnels, bouncing off the walls in very specific ways that had enabled him to listen in on conversations from tunnels away. You simply needed to know where to listen. And he'd known, about all of them. The maze was similar yet different since the walls of green didn't have the same effect on sounds.
...he was doing it again. And he'd told himself he wouldn't spy anymore. Old habits die hard, as they say, and really it was a good way to stay entertained as well. Buttercup's warren -they really should consider giving it a proper name- was just as peaceful as he'd hoped. Living like this, with no worries, no duties, no stupid fighting, no danger, was all he'd ever wanted but still... it could get a tad boring. Boring is good. He told himself. At the very least, it was better than the alternatives. Overall, he liked this place. He even kind of liked the rabbits living here. Sure, their attempts to welcome and get to know him had been rather annoying but in the end they weren't so bad. They mostly let him mind his own business now.
It wasn't Efrafa but Efrafa was no more. This warren would most certainly do to live out the rest of his life in peace. I wish you could've seen this, General. He looked in the direction of the house and smiled softly. As if Woundwort would ever live so close to humans. Vervain had never known exactly what had happened to him in the past but he knew that the General had been terrified of them ever finding Efrafa. He never showed it of course -Frith forbid- but in a way, it was obvious to him. Until he went insane with all his destiny this and destiny that nonsense of course. Now that was one thing Vervain was glad to be rid of! Woundwort had been so volatile and irrational, constantly leading them into more, ever bigger, danger on some mad quest for Frith-knows-what.
He missed him. Not the 'Dark One' but the old Woundwort, the way he had been before Efrafa's destruction. Vervain hadn't expected that. Sure, he knew it would impact him. That was to be expected when the rabbit you spent a large part of your life serving, pleasing in every possible way, observing so you'd know what to say and how to act, if that rabbit were to suddenly disappear from your life, it was only natural to feel lost, wasn't it? But he actually missed him. A lot. So much that he wished the General were here with him now, enjoying this calm and peace, this tranquillity and excellent flayrah, with him. He stared dully at the remains of the carrot now as his mind got lost in memories.
"What, not hungry?" Buttercup's voice snapped Vervain out of his reverie. He hadn't noticed her approach at all.
"Not anymore." He replied without looking at her. He poked the carrot. There was a pause and something told Vervain he should say something else, that he had to act as if everything was fine. He didn't want her to find out anything about him through his behaviour after all. That was what he'd done up until now. What he'd done all his life. In that moment however Vervain found he didn't really care whether she knew what was bothering him or not.
"I see." She said, a lot more subdued than usual, "I just want to say that there's a friend here for you."
Vervain looked up at her, unsure how to respond to such a statement. Thanking her was probably the expected response so he did so, albeit a bit hesitant. Buttercup laughed, amusement dancing in her eyes, "Well, of course, we're all more than willing to be your friend, if you let us, that is." Vervain wondered what was so amusing about that. "However, what I meant was that you have a visitor."
"Oh." Vervain felt stupid now. "A visitor? Who is it?" He asked, doing his best to keep the suspicion out of his voice. He couldn't think of any rabbit that would visit him. Not with friendly intentions at least. Besides, Fiver was the only one who knew he was here. Had he told anyone? Anyone that was out for revenge on him? That doesn't really narrow it down, I suppose.
"An old rabbit. That's why I came to look for you instead. He seemed tired from the journey." Buttercup explained. "Said his name was Silverweed."
"Silverweed?" Old? Silverweed wasn't old at all. What was he then? Ancient?
"Yeah, you know him?" She asked. A bit late to ask for confirmation if she'd already told the visitor he was here. Vervain didn't mention this however.
"Yes, I know a rabbit by that name." He answered instead, "Where is he now?" He might as well go and meet this old rabbit claiming to be Silverweed since they knew he was here anyway. And maybe it was Silverweed after all and Buttercup simply had an odd definition of old.
"I told him to wait near the entrance to the property." Vervain nodded, "I'll go see him then." And hopped off to meet his visitor.
It really was Silverweed. Vervain stared from behind a tree at the white rabbit. He looked much older but it was without a doubt Silverweed. How was this possible? How could he have aged so quickly? And why was he here, looking for him of all rabbits? Then it came to him. Of course, what other reason could there be? It would seem Fiver didn't quite trust him after all. Well then...
"Silverweed." He got out from behind the tree and crossed the last few hops to the other buck. "I hadn't realized it's been that long since we last met."
The comment went straight over Silverweed's head. "It hasn't." Well, he might've looked older but he certainly hadn't grown any wiser.
"What are you doing here, Silverweed?" Vervain decided to just cut to the chase.
"I've been looking for you." Silverweed answered.
"So I've been told." Vervain rolled his eyes. "The question is why? What do you want with me?"
Silverweed remained silent for a few moments, a pensive look on his grey muzzle, before he carefully spoke again, "There is... something I felt I had to tell you." Vervain motioned for him to carry on. "Remember when I asked you why you followed Woundwort?" Oh yes, he remembered. How could he forget? For Silverweed they had stopped, but for him? Nope, of course not! He hadn't been useful like Silverweed any more after all. Just... useless leftovers. Bitterness welled up inside Vervain at the memory. "What of it?" He bit out in response. Silverweed seemed unfazed as he carried on, "I know the answer."
That made Vervain uncomfortable. He knew? Had Silverweed read his heart sometime on the road or in Darkhaven? Or was he doing it now? No, that made no sense. He had to touch him to do that, didn't he? Vervain nervously backed away from the white buck. Not too subtly it seemed, for even Silverweed noticed. "No, I didn't read your heart and I never will." He assuaged. "I lost my powers."
"You came all this way just to tell me you know the answer?" Vervain asked. Silverweed was telling the truth so that meant Fiver hadn't sent him after all.
"No, I came to tell you what happened at the battle." There was sympathy in Silverweed's eyes. Sympathy! Vervain was so taken aback that he didn't reply. "Ma- uhm Woundwort got taken by the Black Rabbit of Inlé who had manifested himself in the world of the living."
Vervain huffed, "So, you're saying even the Black Rabbit was on Watership Down's side?"
"No. I don't think the Black Rabbit is on anyone's side." Silverweed elaborated. "He was just... he wanted to stop Woundwort. Because Woundwort was using his name for his own destruction. He was disrupting the balance in this world. If he'd remained peaceful..."
"None of it would have ever happened." Vervain finished. He sighed, suddenly feeling exhausted. He didn't want to talk about this. He just wanted to go back to that nice patch of grass and finish his carrot. "Why are you telling me this, Silverweed?"
"As I said, you deserve to know." Did he? Vervain wasn't sure. Did he even want to know all this? It wasn't going to change what had happened. "You see, for the Black Rabbit to manifest himself, someone has to cast a spell." He paused. "I was the one that cast it. I unleashed the magic." He looked away from Vervain and stared at the ground. "I killed him. I'm sorry."
Sorry? He was sorry? Is that why he came here, to apologize to him? Vervain had no idea what to make of that. "I know the answer." The answer. Is it because... he knew Vervain missed him? How...?
"You didn't kill him." Vervain broke the silence that had settled between them. "The Black Rabbit took him, personally even. Don't give yourself so much credit."
"But I summoned him." Silverweed reasoned. Vervain didn't understand why he was so determined to take the blame.
"Are you really sorry you did? Would you not do it if you got the chance to decide all over again?"
"I- No, I would still do it. I did it to save my friends and I'd do it all over again." Silverweed answered.
"Then why bother apologizing?" Vervain asked incredulous. "Why come all the way here just to tell me all this?"
"Because, Woundwort got me out of the Warren of Shining Wires which allowed me to see how marvellous this world is and it allowed me to meet my friends." So, because of some convoluted sense of loyalty then. Vervain suppressed a laugh. Woundwort seemed to be good at inspiring those.
"And you, Vervain," Silverweed continued, "You're the one who told him about me."
Vervain narrowed his eyes at Silverweed. "How do you know that?"
"I saw it. In Woundwort's heart. You were there." Wonderful. The one thing that Woundwort remembered, that was apparently important enough to him, just had to be that. That one fatal miscalculation that had only served to spur Woundwort on along his dumb 'destiny'.
"You regret it, don't you?"
Vervain sighed, "Biggest mistake of my life."
"Not your decision to serve Woundwort in the first place?" It wasn't really a question. More an observation. Vervain laughed a little as Silverweed gave him a small smile. What a strange situation this was. The silence that fell over them felt oddly companionable. There was something Vervain wanted to know though he knew he might not like the answer.
"...When you peered into Woundwort's heart... what else did you see?"
The white buck's face fell, the small smile instantly gone. He looked up sadly at Vervain, "Nothing but death and destruction. Anything related to his destiny but beyond that there was nothing. Nothing at all."
"I see." Vervain mumbled. He wasn't sure whether this was the good or the bad answer. He remembered how Woundwort had ignored his advice, made him fall into a trap, foolishly rushed into dangers for no reason, how he'd let the rabbits at Redstone die without even warning them. How he'd been willing to leave Vervain behind. Nothing at all like the Woundwort who had come back for him when the cavern was collapsing. It was actually a relief, knowing this. "You didn't kill Woundwort." He added firmly. Silverweed regarded him for a heartbeat before giving him a small nod.
"Was that all?" Vervain asked after a while. Silverweed nodded again. He looked as if a burden had been lifted from him. Peculiar rabbit, just like Fiver. That reminded him... "I guess you can retire now as well then."
"For what little while I can." Sadness flashed in his green eyes and Vervain realized he was more bothered by his lost youth then he let on. "How is it here?"
"Not perfect." Vervain replied. "But it'll do. It's a good place to spend the rest of my days."
"Perhaps I should stay as well. Buttercup said I was welcome for as long as I wanted."
Vervain frowned. "This place isn't for you." Silverweed seemed surprised by this. "You still have somewhere you can go to."
"Fiver..." The name was barely a whisper.
"Go home, Silverweed."
Silverweed watched as Vervain turned around. Then, barely audible, he heard Vervain whisper what sounded suspiciously much like a thank you before hopping off. Silverweed watched him until he disappeared out of sight. Not once did he look back. He smiled softly, glad he had been able to lighten the buck's heart, even if only a little. Goodbye, Vervain.
Taking a deep breath, he turned around as well and hopped away from the well-hidden warren. Vervain was right. This wasn't where he belonged. Though his bones were old and his muscles aged, Silverweed hopped off with renewed vigour. He had paid his due. It was indeed time to retire and maybe that wasn't all that bad. He might've lost a lot of his seasons but he was still running. Instead of mourning that which he no longer had, Silverweed was determined to cherish the days left to him. After all, they had not been lost in vain. His friends were safe.
It took a few days of travel, evading elil, resting often, but eventually he was standing at the foot of Watership Down. Halfway into the ascent, he spotted Fiver running down to meet him. His eyes sparkled, relief and happiness radiating off him.
"Silverweed!" Fiver skidded to halt in front of him, regarded him for a heartbeat, as if to make sure it was really him, before leaning in to nuzzle him. "I looked everywhere for you!"
"I'm sorry, Fiver. There was just something I had to do."
"It's okay. I'm just glad you're back." Fiver pulled back and looked him in the eye, worried, "You are staying, right?"
"Of course I am." This time Silverweed nuzzled Fiver. "This is my home."
Topic: Retirement (Read 1303 times)